When I was younger, I looked up to my older (and only) sister.
Both physically because there's an (almost) 5 year age gap between us;
And emotionally, with adoration.
Don't get me wrong...
I still look up to her.
Literally.
Because she is like, 6 foot tall or something;
But also because I think she possesses amazing qualities that I envy.
She is energetic and wields an enthusiasm for life that is endearing and contagious.
I digress.
The point is -
She's the Big Sister,
And as the Big Sister, it was her job to teach me things.
To impress her skills and knowledge upon me.
To share her wisdom, so that I could be cool
Just. Like. Her.
Insert the story about the time my cool Big Sister taught me that mixing orange juice and milk in a glass,
then sculling said concoction would cause excessive vomiting,
then sculling said concoction would cause excessive vomiting,
thus ensuring you were guaranteed a Sick Day and wouldn't have to go to school.
Yes, it really happened.
No, she doesn't remember it.
We practically had to be on our death bed to be granted a day off school,
So this was a fool proof plan.
AND (she assured me),
Once you'd vommed a couple of times,
You'd feel fine;
So, could enjoy your day at home tucked up on the couch watching trashy day time tv.
She might have been a Child Genius...
I'm not dragging us all down Memory Lane for no reason BTW.
But simply to introduce you to
T H E O R A N G E J U I C E
A N D M I L K T H E O R Y
They simply don't go together.
Separately ?
No problems*.
(*Lactose intolerance excluded)
But together?
Not recommended.
Here's the core of my Theory -
Some people are Orange Juice;
And others are Milk.
So what does that mean?
Well, they simply don't go together.
(For the record, my sis and I are more like a Vodka Orange combination...
The perfect mix of sweet and fun)
(For the record, my sis and I are more like a Vodka Orange combination...
The perfect mix of sweet and fun)
xx
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