overthinker

I've written about my chronic overthinking in the past.

Have you ever heard the name Katrina Webb?

I'll admit that until last week, I hadn't.

She's is an Australian Paralympic Athlete.

She has won Gold, Silver and Bronze medals in 3 Olympics.

And last week she came to my workplace to give a speech on setting and achieving goals, 

and overcoming fears.

She spoke about overcoming adversity, 

accepting our own vulnerability, 

and using mindfulness to quiet the mind.

Everyone in the room was captivated, 

not only by her sheer determination to succeed, 

but by her honesty and conviction.

Stories of own personal fears and challenges were relatable.

In sharing her experiences of self-doubt and her strategies to overcome her negative thinking, 

she was able to unite us.

Often, we are not unique in our fears,

We are unique in how we choose to deal with them.

O U R   M I N D S

C A N   B E   O U R   B I G G E S T   S U P P O R T E R S

 A N D   O U R   S T R O N G E S T   E N E M Y

xx

f e a r l e s s

Hello, my name is Andie

and I am Queen of the What Ifs.

You know - 

"Yeah... we could do that but what if...?"

I mean, I'm not running around town like Chicken Little 

(ie. screaming "The sky is falling! The sky is falling!")

But I am pretty thorough in evaluating all potential outcomes of a scenario, 

particularly the ones that could end in catastrophe.

I'm the girl who likes to have a Plan A and a Plan B.

Also a Plan C, D, E... 

Well.. You get the picture.

And so it is with great intrigue that upon choosing my word for 2016,

I started to see examples of it everywhere.

I hadn't even announced it to anyone yet.

But over the past few weeks, several people, in a variety of conversations about a range of topics have stopped me in my What If tracks and asked

A N D I E , W H A T ' S   T H E   W O R S T   

T H A T   C A N   H A P P E N ?

Answers to this question have varied depending on the scale of risk involved;

but the consensus is something like 

"I might look silly, but I'll get over it"

or 

"It doesn't work out... so then I move on".

I must admit -

even the worse case scenarios tend to be far over-shadowed by the excitement of potential of success.

And so, following on from my Word of the Year in 2015 - Balance - 

I am excited to unveil my word for 2016...

Yesterday, at the end of my Hot Yoga class, the teacher spoke to us about... yup, you guessed it ... 

FEAR.

Specifically her recent fears related to meeting with someone she had matched with on Tinder.

Let's all take a moment to appreciate that despite their calming voices and ultra-flexible bodies, 

Yoga Teachers are real humans too.

What struck me about her story,

(in addition to an ego-driven "See? Perky blonde yoga teachers struggle to find decent men too")

was that fear is relative.

We all have different fears.

These fears are the result of our own stories.

The stories we tell ourselves are not real.

So this year I am making a conscious effort to ditch the What If's.

This year is about being fearless.

xx

four letters, starts with 'F'

F   E   A   R

That all-consuming, breath-taking, weight-in-your-stomach emotion that causes paralysis equivalent to catching a deer in the headlights.

I know you are familiar with this feeling.

If you're like me, you'll have experienced it before a job interview, or whilst giving a presentation to a room full of suit-and-tie clients, or even more simply (but equally as terrifying), opening up to someone new.

The one thing that has become increasingly clear to me is that so many people around me are making life choices based on their fears.

As in - "I can't do X because I am too scared".

I will be the first to admit that I have chosen a different (read 'easier') path on more than one occasion using this exact logic.

But I had a breakthrough moment yesterday after spending several hours with a friend's baby who is trying to walk before he can stand. As I sat on the floor watching him I began to really understand that fear is a learned emotion. It is a product of our own thoughts. We create our own fear based on past experiences or conjured in our over-active imaginations.

Time and time again, Baby O would pull himself up, steadying himself against the furniture, release his hands which were supporting him, and promptly fall to the ground.

He had no fear of falling. And when he did, someone would catch him. Or he would land on his well-padded butt. Occasionally, he would get a shock from the sudden downward motion and shed a tear. But he would soon get right back up and try again.

That's when I realised that as we get older, our fear overwhelms us because we lose perspective.
We are not afraid of standing - We have become fearful of the fall.
And sometimes, that fear stops us from getting back up and trying again.

Your fear may not be of falling (physically or emotionally) but the lesson here is that in many scenarios, the worst thing that can happen is usually not all that bad (or even particularly likely).

You will survive the interview; or rock the presentation; or form a closer bond with someone.

Recognise what it is you are truly fearful of. And do it anyway. Because, just like my friend's son, we get stronger each time we try. And eventually, standing unassisted and even taking that first step becomes easy, the fear is gone, and we can achieve something wonderful.

here

xx