seduced by words

I am a writer.

OK.. So I'm not the kind who gets paid to put prose to paper; reach an assigned quota; or meet a deadline.

But I do pour my thoughts out of my head and onto the page.

I'm the girl who believes in the significance of words.

Who values both the price of those written in silence and spoken out loud.

The kind who carefully forms thoughts into sentences.

Who knows that language is a gift.

Perhaps it is because I am a writer, or maybe it's just me... 

But I am the girl who believes in the power of the things I say.

I   S A Y   W H A T   I   M E A N 

I   M E A N   W H A T   I   S A Y

(And if I can't say it, then I remain silent... but that's a story for another day)

Even the simplest words can convey a significant message.

Every word has a worth.

And because I find beauty in letters strung together to form a meaning;

And because I appreciate the art of articulation - 

 I   A M   S E D U C E D   B Y   W O R D S

So it never occurred to me to question that others may not consider the value of their own.

Then again, I am the girl who believes that a pinky promise is a valid contractual agreement.

So I am learning that words alone (though magical in their seduction) are not quite enough.

In the currency of language -

Words and promises are only worth something if they are accompanied by action.

xx

afraid of love

I wanted to write a post about love to coincide with Valentine's Day.

Wanted to.

As in, kept sitting in front of my computer and staring at the screen.

Scrolling through Insta quotes and Pinterest Pins and not finding the perfect words around which I could form my thoughts.

Struggling.

A very quick self-evaluation would have me admit that this is because

I  D O N ' T   D O   F E E L I N G S

But honestly?

It's because I do!
But I never write about them here.

I write about fluffy stuff.
Don't I?!
My last post is about the complexities of modern dating in a world of situationships!
Other topics about which I choose write, I will happily (and endlessly) discuss/debate/deliberate.
With anybody.

And so, it soon became apparent that I am not suffering from an absence of feelings.
But quite the opposite.

I have recently become incredibly aware of who is reading these words.
My thoughts.
My opinions.
My feelings.

And all of a sudden, I am suffering from writers block.

And then I remembered this gem.

As I read this quote,, I am reminded of that time I wrote about vulnerability.
And that time I wrote about trust.

So perhaps I am writing about my feelings far more often than I admit to myself.

S H I T !

How did that even happen?!

And if that's the case, then why am I having such difficulty forming thoughts around what is arguably The Most Important Feeling Of Them All?

L O V E

The short answer?
(Also known as 'the brutally honest, shut-my-eyes-and-say-it-quick' answer)

Because I have spent so much time (and energy) avoiding it.


*Insert huge thank-goodness-I-finally-got-that-off-my-chest exhale here*

•

•

•

So suddenly I am dealing with writer's block and a brand new revelation, 
(Which ironically has come to me, only as I write...)
I think it's best if I allow someone else to reveal my feelings on my behalf...

Yup. Terrified of love. Right here. Me.

But now I'm publicly declaring that is all about to change.

Why?

Well let's all take a minute to remember my word and focus for the next 12 months*...

And then break it down nice and simple :

And if there's one way a person should love - 
It is fearlessly.



xx


*Bonus points to those who remembered what it was.

so many ships in the harbour

Once upon a time, before mobile phones became a miniature computer with the means to keep you ultra-connected to anyone at anytime... Dating was (apparently) very simple.

Boy meets girl; 

Boy likes girl; 

Boy asks girl out on a date 

(Classic Combo: Dinner and a movie).

Insert montage of super romantic activities like wine tasting and mini-golf*.

(NB. Super Romantic Montage does not involve Boy sending Girl endless text messages (and snapchats and tagging her in endless memes on Facebook or Instagram) but rarely actually interacting with her face to face.. Except for random appearances on her door step well after a 'reasonable hour' and slipping back out under the cover of darkness right before dawn.)

Or so I've heard...

This probably the most accurate thing I have read all year.

"Situationships?!" I hear you ask.

Yes. They're a thing.

Relationships, Situationships, Textationships...

Present day dating requires you to learn a whole new lexicon*.

Allow the girls from The Hills and I to educate you.

Let's start with the basics...

F R I E N D S H I P

A state of mutual trust and support.
A promise to help someone no matter the circumstances, subsequently proven by actions.

R E L A T I O N S H I P

Any type of connection that brings two individuals together for a period of time.

Something other than a friends with benefits.

More than a mutual understanding!!

S I T U A T I O N S H I P

A situationship is kinda like a relationship, but more of a situation.

Friends with benefits are in a situationship.

People that are a 'thing' are in a situationship.

T E X T A T I O N S H I P

A friendly, romantic, sexual or intimate relationship, either brief or long-term, between two people whereby text messaging is utilized as the primary form of communication.

A relationship bound strictly to text messages with the absence of an actual physical connection, including but not limited to dates, sex, etc.
One may use pictures, Facebook, or sexts, but it is strictly a screen-based relationship.

E - F L I R T I N G

When someone is great at online communication

(such as sending flirtatious emails and text messages)

but never actually gets the courage to hang out with you in person.

A way to pretend you are in a relationship with someone without actually seeing them.

Sure... It seems innocent enough...

G A M E  P L A Y E R
A person that plays games, like mind games with others

C O N F U S I O N

Uncertainty about what is happening, intended or required.

The state of being bewildered or unclear in one's mind about something.

G H O S T I N G
The act of suddenly ceasing all communication with someone with whom you are in a 'ship' (friendship, relationship, situationship).
This is done in the hopes that the ghostee will just 'get the hint' and leave the subject alone, as opposed to the subject simply telling them he/she is no longer interested.

S L O W  F A D E

Unlike ghosting, the slow fade is a more gradual way of cutting off communication with someone. 

The slow fade is when you begin to respond/interact less and less until you stop talking altogether.

       

J E R K
An obnoxious, arrogant, self-centered male who women can't seem to get enough of.

S I L L Y  G I R L

When a person of the female gender, behaves in a silly manner.

A F
AF stands for “as fuck.”
But it is commonly used to describe someone who is super single.
So, someone is “single AF.”

L O V E

A strong feeling of affection.

The act of caring and giving to someone else.

Having someone's best interest and wellbeing as a priority in your life.

Either a horrible disease or a blessing.

A D V I C E
Guidance or recommendations offered with regard to prudent action,
Usually offered by concerned friends and family,
Often ignored or disregarded.

xx

*Definitions adapted from Urban Dictionary

what happens to me if i fail your test?

Connection [noun]

a relationship in which a person or thing is linked or associated with something else.

Attraction [noun]
the action or power of evoking interest in or liking for someone or something.
a quality or feature that evokes interest, liking, or desire.

Trust [noun]

firm belief in the reliability, truth, or ability of someone or something.

 Love [noun]

a strong feeling of affection.

Being able to identify and experience these emotions is what makes us innately human...

.

.

.

Isn't it??

Do yourself a favour this weekend;

Pour a glass of wine, cook some popcorn and settle in for a movie night.

The movie?

E X   M A C H I N A

I'd never heard of it when I watched it and I'm thankful I had no expectations.

I don't want to say too much...
Even though I talked about it to anyone who would listen for days.

Hands down - One of the best movies I have seen in a long time.

And now I've learnt that it's up for a whole bunch of awards.

Critics Choice Awards

Best Original Screenplay

Best Visual Effects

Best Sci-Fi/Horror Movie - WINNER

Oscar Nominations

Best Writing, Screenplay Written Directly for the Screen

Best Achievement in Visual Effects

Golden Globe Nominations

Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role in a Motion Picture - Alicia Vikander 

And when you've seen it - Let me know so we can chat.




xx