Once upon a time, before mobile phones became a miniature computer with the means to keep you ultra-connected to anyone at anytime... Dating was (apparently) very simple.
Boy meets girl;
Boy likes girl;
Boy asks girl out on a date
(Classic Combo: Dinner and a movie).
Insert montage of super romantic activities like wine tasting and mini-golf*.
(NB. Super Romantic Montage does not involve Boy sending Girl endless text messages (and snapchats and tagging her in endless memes on Facebook or Instagram) but rarely actually interacting with her face to face.. Except for random appearances on her door step well after a 'reasonable hour' and slipping back out under the cover of darkness right before dawn.)
Or so I've heard...
This probably the most accurate thing I have read all year.
"Situationships?!" I hear you ask.
Yes. They're a thing.
Relationships, Situationships, Textationships...
Present day dating requires you to learn a whole new lexicon*.
Allow the girls from The Hills and I to educate you.
Let's start with the basics...
F R I E N D S H I P
G H O S T I N G
The act of suddenly ceasing all communication with someone with whom you are in a 'ship' (friendship, relationship, situationship).
This is done in the hopes that the ghostee will just 'get the hint' and leave the subject alone, as opposed to the subject simply telling them he/she is no longer interested.
Let's start with the basics...
F R I E N D S H I P
A state of mutual trust and support.
A promise to help someone no matter the circumstances, subsequently proven by actions.
G A M E P L A Y E R
A person that plays games, like mind games with others
A promise to help someone no matter the circumstances, subsequently proven by actions.
R E L A T I O N S H I P
Any type of connection that brings two individuals together for a period of time.
Something other than a friends with benefits.
More than a mutual understanding!!
S I T U A T I O N S H I P
A situationship is kinda like a relationship, but more of a situation.
Friends with benefits are in a situationship.
People that are a 'thing' are in a situationship.
T E X T A T I O N S H I P
A friendly, romantic, sexual or intimate relationship, either brief or long-term, between two people whereby text messaging is utilized as the primary form of communication.
A relationship bound strictly to text messages with the absence of an actual physical connection, including but not limited to dates, sex, etc.
One may use pictures, Facebook, or sexts, but it is strictly a screen-based relationship.
One may use pictures, Facebook, or sexts, but it is strictly a screen-based relationship.
E - F L I R T I N G
When someone is great at online communication
(such as sending flirtatious emails and text messages)
but never actually gets the courage to hang out with you in person.
A way to pretend you are in a relationship with someone without actually seeing them.
Sure... It seems innocent enough...
G A M E P L A Y E R
A person that plays games, like mind games with others
C O N F U S I O N
Uncertainty about what is happening, intended or required.
The state of being bewildered or unclear in one's mind about something.
The act of suddenly ceasing all communication with someone with whom you are in a 'ship' (friendship, relationship, situationship).
This is done in the hopes that the ghostee will just 'get the hint' and leave the subject alone, as opposed to the subject simply telling them he/she is no longer interested.
S L O W F A D E
Unlike ghosting, the slow fade is a more gradual way of cutting off communication with someone.
The slow fade is when you begin to respond/interact less and less until you stop talking altogether.
J E R K
An obnoxious, arrogant, self-centered male who women can't seem to get enough of.
An obnoxious, arrogant, self-centered male who women can't seem to get enough of.
S I L L Y G I R L
When a person of the female gender, behaves in a silly manner.
A F
AF stands for “as fuck.”
But it is commonly used to describe someone who is super single.
So, someone is “single AF.”
AF stands for “as fuck.”
But it is commonly used to describe someone who is super single.
So, someone is “single AF.”
L O V E
A strong feeling of affection.
The act of caring and giving to someone else.
Having someone's best interest and wellbeing as a priority in your life.
Either a horrible disease or a blessing.
A D V I C E
Guidance or recommendations offered with regard to prudent action,
Usually offered by concerned friends and family,
Often ignored or disregarded.
Guidance or recommendations offered with regard to prudent action,
Usually offered by concerned friends and family,
Often ignored or disregarded.
xx
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